21 days left to the end of the year. Yet the word surrounding what my life this year has revolved around is failure.
Failure to keep you happy. Failure to make the NJC soccer team. Failure to prevent my friends from drifting away.
Someone once commented that success as a person is how many people remember your birthday. Failure again.
This again is no stranger to my life of half chances, regrets and falling short. I cant even count the number of times i have told myself "I should have done this." or regretted what i have done or said.
My heart hurts. It sounds so melodramatic and so emo "john-huang style" but its true and i cannot take this. Somewhere somehow, the hurting must stop. I cant see the end but you are all i got.
The clutching ache on the left of my chest is now a dull throb that is emotionally draining. This transcends physical pain.
"somewhere, the pain must stop." Terry fox.
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